


Daddy?

by SimiTheTrickster



Category: Original Work
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-19
Updated: 2017-06-19
Packaged: 2018-11-15 22:54:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11240976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SimiTheTrickster/pseuds/SimiTheTrickster
Summary: I wrote this for Father's day.





	Daddy?

**Author's Note:**

> I just lost my father in January. I can't believe it's been six months already...

I am outside, though I cannot remember how I got here. It is night, and I am in my nightgown. It’s simple and white; it hangs just barely above my knee, though my mind won’t focus on the details past that. The grass beneath me is misted with dew; I can feel the cold of it on my bared feet. The sky above me is so dark a blue, it’s nearly black. It’s clear, and every star is shining brighter than I’ve ever seen before.  
There’s a pressure in my chest, and it’s one that has been there for months now. It’s deep and painful, I can’t even remember what it was like to not feel it. I can’t remember how it got there, or the reason for it’s appearance, but it’s there.  
There’s a nagging feeling in the back of my mind; it burns and caresses at my subconcious, but I can’t bring it to the forefront. It feels important, but my brain refuses to allow me to focus on it.  
“Daddy?” I call out softly, but it seems to have been a mistake. The wind begins to whip around me. It’s cold; I feel it biting, clawing, pinching at my skin. The word was simple, but the single utterance seems to have upset Mother Nature. She seems to be giving me a silent warning, but I don’t understand it and therefore I do not heed it.  
The nagging feeling in my subconcious picks up fervor; like a rat clawing at a wall, the feeling grows much more intense, but I still cannot focus on it.  
“Where are you?” I whisper, and it seems to be the wrong thing to do. The wind whips more violently, forcing my nightgown to cling viciously to my skin; the fabric seemed to bite and cut into me. A fog forms around me; the clear night has become an intimidating presence. Gone are the stars, gone is the beautiful blue-black of the night. Left in it’s wake is now a terrifying fog, cloud coverage formed and it seems angry.  
The nagging inkling in the back of my head finally forms, but it takes root in a less identifying way. I still can’t grasp what the feeling is, but it crashes down on me in a whirlwind of emotions; anger, sorrow, heartache, disbelief, shock. It slams into me with such force, I lose my breath. I am left gasping, and without knowledge of why.  
“Daddy, I need you!” I beg as I get my breath back, but there’s no response, and there never will be. I drop to my knees as the wall falls in my mind and I remember just why the weight formed in my chest.   
My father.. no, my Daddy. My best friend. My confidant.  
I fall to my knees in the wet grass and bury my face into my hands. My nightgown soaks up the freezing dewdrops like a sponge; the fabric clings to my skin and bites with the cold. But I don’t care. Sobs wrack my entire body, the tears fall heavily and threaten to never stop. But I don’t care. The sky seems to open up just like my tear ducts and pours freezing rain on me. But I don’t care.  
My best friend. My confidant. My father. No.  
My Daddy…  
Gone are the days we shared. Gone are the coffee talks with morning cigarettes. Gone are the cuddles on the couch. Gone are the giggles and tickle fights. Gone are the movies, with little snickers and jokes in between dialogue. Gone are the inside jokes and secrets.  
Gone is my happiness. My life seems to have ended.  
Daddy, you are gone. I miss you. I need you. But you are gone. And all that is left in your wake is emptiness, but at the same time… I am full. Full of broken dreams, sorrow, grief, damaged hope.   
I love you…

**Author's Note:**

> This is a true expression of how I feel.


End file.
